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Rabbi Chayim Friedlander
A Peaceful Home
Chapter 5 - Lesson 3
Sometimes the wife is more expert than her husband in financial
matters and it is possible to leave to her the money management
of the household expenses, and taking care of the bank statements
and the like. Or there are instances where the wife is not expert or
talented in these matters, and in those cases those matters become
the responsibility of the husband. In any event, at times when there
is financial pressure and additional money is required to balance
the household budget, obtaining a loan is the responsibility of the
husband, as we said this earlier.
.ם ָכ ָח ת ַל ֵא ְֶ לֹא ְֶ ֶל ךְי ֶר ָצ י ַת ָמ ע ַדֵי תּח ָפ ְלּ ִֶ י ֵד ְכּ ,ה ָע ֵדּ ה ִרּי
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Chapter 5 - Lesson 3
The obligation of a husband to influence and guide
the spiritual values of his family.
Prior to her marriage the wife absorbed her spirituality from a
number of different places; from her father’s house, from lectures
and from study groups in Beit Yaakov seminary. Now she looks to
her husband to set the direction of the family in the ways of Torah
and to provide her with her spiritual sustenance. All this is included
within the Torah’s category of “She’er” - to give her all of her needs,
including her spiritual needs. On occasion the young husband is
indecisive when confronted by this obligation. It is possible that
his wife studied more chapters than he did in the Kuzari, in the
Ramban and in the Michtav M’Eliyahu, since he is fully immersed
in the study of the Gemara and its commentaries. Chatan – Do
not worry about this; your wife knows that, and her teachers have
said and emphasized to her what a Ben Torah is and what a Ben
yeshiva is. With all of this she hopes that he will be at the level of a
Talmid Chacham who will provide her with the spiritual “food” she
needs. With a little effort and a good attitude it will not be difficult
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# רדנלדירפ םייח ברה
ךלהא םולש יכ תעדיו סרטנוק
א רמאמ - י ֶֶי ֶמ ֲח ר ִר ִׁ
ֶוּר ָדּ אלֹ .א ָר ְמוּח ְל ג ֵה ַנ ְת ֶנ ר ֵפ ָס ת ַמ ֲח ֵמּ ִֶ הּ ָל ר ַמּל ְו ,ה ָכ ָל ֲה
ךְ ַא ,ךְוּר ָע פ ָח ְל ֻשּׁ ַה י ֵר ְל ִח ל ָכ ְבּ ה ָרוּר ְבּ ה ָכ ָל ֲה ע ַדֵיּ ִֶ וּנּ ִמּ ֶמ
,תּרּר ְמּ ַה ךְּתּ ֶמ הּ ָתּא ר ֵר ָבְי אוּה - ה ָל ֵא ְֶ ת ִר ִרּע ְת ֶמ ר ִֶ ֲא ַכּ
ל ָל ְכ ֶבּ .רוּר ָבּ ר ָס ְׁ ּתּ ְֶ ֶא ְל אי ֶבָי ְו ,ה ָא ָרּה ה ֵרּמ לֹא ְֶ ֶל ךְ ֵלֵי ּא
,תּכ ָל ֲה דוּמּ ֶל ְל פ ַמ ְז ֶי ֶדּ ְר ַה ְל ךְי ֶר ָצ אוּה ִֶ ת ַע ַד ָל ךְ ֵר ְב ַא ָה ל ַע
פ ָתּא ה ָד ְמ ָל ּתּ ְֶ ֶא פ ָר ְל ִח ְבּ( תֶי ַבּ ַל תּע ְגּנּ ַה ה ִלּ ֵא ְל דוּחֶי ְבּ
תּכ ְל ֶה ת ָצ ְר ם ַגּ ת ַע ַד ָל וי ָל ָע .)ר ָני ֶמ ִסּ ַבּ ָהי ִדוּמּ ֶל ת ִר ִגּ ְס ֶמ ְבּ
ם ֵה ךְ ָכּ םוּשּׁ ֶמוּ ,ר ֵפ ָס ְבּ די ֶמ ָתּ םי ֶר ָא ְֶ ֶנ ם ָע ְב ֶטּ ֶמּ ִֶ םי ֶֶ ָנ ֲא שֵׁי
הֹׁ .תֶי ַבּ ַבּ הּ ָמּר ְמ פי ֵא ּז תוּג ֲה ַנ ְת ֶה .תּר ְמוּח ַה ת ִא םי ֶשׂ ְׁ ַח ְמ
פי ֵא ם ַגּ .םי ֶרוּר ְבּ םי ֶר ָס ְׁ ר ֵסּׁ ַה ב ַר ָה תּי ְה ֶל ךְי ֶר ָצ ל ַע ַבּ ַה
פי ֵא ִֶ םּר ָמ ְבּ ,םי ֶר ֵח ֲא פּבּ ְֶ ִח ל ַע אלֹ ְו ,םי ֶר ֵח ֲא ַל רי ֶמ ְח ַה ְל
:ל" ַצ ַז ס"ירגה ר ַמ ָא םי ֶרוּדּ ֶה ל ַע ם ַגּ .ה ָכ ָל ֲה י ֶׁ ל ַע ַח ֵר ְכ ִה
י ֵׁ ַל ְכּ יא ַדּ ַו ְבּ ג ֵהּנ ה ִז ל ָל ְכּ ."ת ַלוּזּ ַה פּבּ ְֶ ִח ל ַע ר ֵדּ ַה ְל רוּס ָא"
ת ַע ַדּ לוּקּ ֶֶ םי ֶֶ ְרּדּ םי ֶרוּדּ ֶה ְו תּר ְמוּח ,םי ֶנ ָׁ ל ָכּ ל ַע .ּתּ ְֶ ֶא
.פּכ ָנ
,פ ָעּצ ְר ֶמ ת ַמ ֲח ֵמ ה ָבוֶּ ֲח ה ָד ְמ ִע תּל ֲע ַבּ םי ֶֶ ָנ ם ַגּ ִֶ םי ֶאּר וּנָא
פ ָתי ֵב ְבּ ִֶ תּצּר ,ר ִפ ֵס י ֵתּ ָבּ תּל ֲה ַנ ְמ ּא תּרי ֶכ ְבּ תּרּמ פּג ְכּ
תּר ֵֶ ְכּ םי ֶֶ ָנ תּי ְה ֶל תּצּר פ ֵה ְו ,תֶי ַבּ ַה ת ִא גי ֶה ְנ ַמ ל ַע ַבּ ַה הִי ְהֶי
ה ָב ָה .ה ָשּׁ ֶא ָה ע ַב ִט ְבּ ַעוּב ָט ה ִז ,רוּמ ָא ָכּ .פ ִהי ֵל ֲע ַבּ פּצ ְר תּשּׂע ָה
.ךְ ָכ ְל תוּר ֶָ ְפ ִא ָה ת ִא הּ ָל פ ֵתּ ֶנ
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