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Rabbi Chayim Friedlander רדנלדירפ םייח ברה
A Peaceful Home ךלהא םולש יכ תעדיו סרטנוק
Chapter 1 - Lesson 3 ז רמאמ - פֶּא ֶר ר ִר ִׁ

her family. Our Rabbis Z”L explained (in Gemara Sotah 11b) in one .ז רמאמ
of the commentaries on the pasuk (Shemot 1:13) “Egypt enslaved
the Jewish people imposing on them oppressive work” – that the
Egyptians forced men’s labor onto the women and women’s labor "שׁי ִא ָה ן ִמ ר ֵתוֹי ה ָני ִבּ הּ ָבּ ן ָתּ ִנ"
onto the men. Chazal’s commentary needs to be explained. One can
understand that men’s physically taxing work imposed on women
is oppressive work for women. But imposing women’s work on פ ִבֶיּ ַו" .ה ָשּׁ ֶא ָה ל ִֶ ד ָחֻי ְמ ַה הָּי ְפ ָא ְבּ ף ָסּנ ד ַצ וּנ ָל ה ָלּ ַג ְמ הרָוֹתַּה
men is much less physically taxing and is not oppressive?! The
explanation is – Even though from the perspective that women’s תי ֶֶא ֵר ְבּ[ "ה ָשּׁ ֶא ָל ם ָד ָא ָה פ ֶמ ח ַר ָל ר ִֶ ֲא ע ָל ֵצּ ַה ת ִא םי ֶרלֹ ֱא 'ה
work is physically less taxing than men’s work, yet on an emotional תי ֶֶא ֵר ְבּ[ "ֶי ֶא ָה פ ֶמ ר ֵתּי ה ָני ֶבּ הּ ָבּ פ ָתּ ֶנ" :ל" ַז ַר וֶּ ְר ָד ְו ]ב"כ ,'ב
level it is hard for men to do the work of women because they don’t
see any point to it and derive no satisfaction from it. Someone .ד ַמ ָל םי ֶר ֵח ֲא ֵמ םי ֶר ָב ְדּ ַע ֵמֶּ ם ָד ָא ִשּׁ ה ַמ :ה ָמ ְכ ָח ְבּ .]'א ,ח"י ה ָבּ ַר
involved in an occupation will be successful only if he has pleasure תּמ ְֶ י" ֶֶ ַר[ "ד ַמ ָלּ ִֶ םי ֶר ָב ְדּ ךְּתּ ֶמ ּבּ ֶלּ ֶמ ר ָב ָדּ פי ֶב ֵמ :ה ָנוּב ְת ֶבוּ
and satisfaction from his occupation. A tailor has satisfaction when ת ִא ףי ֶקּ ַמוּ ס ֵפּתּ ם ָד ָא ר ִֶ ֲא ַכּ - אי ֶה ה ָמ ְכ ָח ת ַני ֶח ְבּ .]'ג ,א"ל
he sews together a beautiful garment. A contractor has pride when
he completes the construction of a building that is beautiful. A רֹס ְמ ֶל ל ַכוּיּ ִֶ י ֵד ְכּ ד ַע ,םי ֶר ָב ְדּ ַה ת ִא ט ַל ָר ְו ,ּבּ ַר ֵמ ע ַמ ָשּׁ ִשּׁ ה ַמ
teacher is successful only when he feels a sense of satisfaction from ם ִהי ֵר ְל ִח ְל ר ֵר ָפ ְמ ר ִֶ ֲא ַכּ - אי ֶה ה ָני ֶבּ ת ַני ֶח ְבּ .ם ָתָי ָו ֲה ַכּ ם ָתּא
teaching and advancing his students – and if not, then woe unto
the teacher and woe unto the students – both the teacher and the ה ִלּ ֵא ָה םי ֶר ָל ֲח ַה פ ֶמ תּנ ְב ֶל לּכָי אוּה ְו ,ע ַמ ָשּׁ ִֶ םי ֶר ָב ְדּ ַה ת ִא
students suffer. )פָי ְנ ֶבּ - פ ִב ִא פֶּ ְלּ ֶמ ה ָני ֶבּ( ּבּ ַר ֵמ ע ַמ ֶָ אלֹּ ִֶ םי ֶֶ ָד ֲח םי ֶנָי ְנ ֶבּ

By placing the responsibility of managing the needs of the .ּבּ ַר ת ַרּתּ ֶמ ם ֵה םי ֶע ְבּנ ל ָב ֲא
family on the woman Hashem Yitbarach gave her pleasure and
satisfaction from the job of caring for her family, which from the ךְּתּ ֶמ םי ֶט ָר ְׁ ַה ת ִא תּא ְר ֶל ה ָנוּכ ְתּ ה ָשּׁ ֶא ָל פ ַת ָנ ךְ ַר ָבּ ְתֶי 'ה
perspective of the husband is monotonous and repetitive - and that
is oppressive work for a man as Chazal explained in the reference רֹס ֲע ַל ה ָלּכְי אי ֶה ְו ,פָי ְנ ֶבּ ַה ל ַל ְכּ ת ִא תּא ְר ֶל ר ַר אלֹ ְו ,פָי ְנ ֶבּ ַה
above. Therefore, HaKadosh Baruch Hu endowed the personality תּבּכּ ְר ֶתּ פ ִה ֵמ תּנ ְב ֶל ְו ,פָי ְנ ֶע ם ִה ָבּ אֹצ ְמ ֶל ְו ה ִלּ ֵא םי ֶט ָר ְפ ֶבּ
of a woman with great sensitivity and emotional feelings which
guide her more than strict intellect. The woman is preoccupied תֶי ַבּ ַה תּבּח .הּ ָדי ֶר ְפ ַתּ יוּלּ ֶמ ְל הּ ָל ה ָצוּח ְנ ּז ה ָנוּכ ְתּ .תּנֶּ
with household matters that are connected to the physical world. םי ֶט ָר ְפ ֶבּ םי ֶמ ָע ְפ ֶל ְו ,םי ֶט ָר ְפ ֶבּ רוּסּ ֶע פ ֵה ה ָשּׁ ֶא ָה ל ַע תּל ָטּ ֻמּ ַה
The approach to the physical world is through her senses – where
feelings are more important than intellect. A woman has a great ַעּצ ְר ֶמ פ ֵכ ָל( ם ָלי ֶב ְֶ ֶבּ ַחוּר ךְ ִרֹא ר ִב ִגּ ַל פי ֵא ִֶ ,םי ֶטוּע ְפוּ םי ֶנּ ַט ְר
deal of feelings and sensitivities regarding the organization and the םי ֶנּ ַט ְר םי ֶט ָר ְפ ֶבּ לוּׁ ֶט ֶ ֵרּדּ י ֶכּ ,י ֶֶ ָנ רוּסּ ֶע אוּה תוּרי ֶכּ ְז ַמּ ַה
cleanliness and the beauty of her home. A home that is clean and .)םיֶיּ ֶנּגּ-ד ַח ְו
orderly gives her a great sense of inner satisfaction.

The husband also understands that things should be orderly. For

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