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not inclined to flight, who paused at the approaches, would have heard
   hysterical laughter blending with nursery rhymes played bongo-like on empty
   beer cans. Going on in one corner would be a heated discussion on the relative
   merits and efficiency of the rack.
        You may wonder how such a civilization existed. However, the reason
   becomes clear when one fact is discussed. Strangely, no word of this
   society is known to have reached the Supreme ruling body, which was
   situated many units of measure to the north-west. Thus this mighty people
   became known to history as the “Forgotten Race” (the Semper Fidelans).

   MODERN HAIRSTYLES - -

        Are there such things as Modern Hairstyles? You may well ask !
        Firstly, the applied adjective “Modern” is incorrect, for in the year
   dot, our Grannies were wearing French rolls and buns. Secondly, the word
   “Style” is inappropriate, for those wind-swept concoctions can scarcely be
   called “Styles”.
        And oh, my top-knot! Such names are supplied! Sugar Loaf. Honey
   Roll. Marshmallow Fix. They sound more weight-producing than beauty
   producing.
        It’s all very well for you young ladies who can afford an hour or so
   in front of the mirror, attending your coiffure. But for the average
   schoolgirl, who is forever running late, she must be content with a glance
   in the mirror, and a comb used in haste. Oh, please! I appeal to your
   better nature! Can’t someone—anyone—create something to avoid these
   monstrosities—an arrangement that takes but a few seconds to fix?
        Maybe the solution, adopted by a certain actor, would ease the situa
   tion. If we must give the style a name, why not “Billiard Ball Bob”. Then
   some school rule could require our heads to be technicoloured and a head
   paint could be used in School or House Colours either striped, stippled,
   smeared or spotted.
        Oh, me. oh my! What a lix ! What is the world—oops, sorry, head—
   coining to ?
                                                   Carol Bryning, Form 4C2.

   RECIPE OF HOW TO CRAM
   FOR AN EXAM. - -
   INGREDIENTS—Several books of knowledge;
        1 comfortable chair;
        much food;
        2 noisy quarrelsome brothers.
   METHOD—Sift together: Latin. French. Chemistry, and Geography. Repeat
        important facts aloud, mixing well after each addition. When the
        mixture is well beaten, add brothers to provide a background rumpus.
        Stir well. Boil (brothers included). Leave a few hours to sleep.
        Early next morning, before exam, starts repeat whole procedure and
        then place self in exam, room to stew.
        SERVE blank paper into teachers. Excellent results may be expected.
     Gaston (Chef). —Francaise (4A1).




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