Page 289 - It Ends with Us

I feel tha t was a ver y light punishm ent for wha t she end ured .

When I dec ided I want ed to write thi s story, I firs t asked my mother
for permi ssion. I told her I want ed to write it for women like her. I
also wanted to write it for all the peo ple who didn’t quite und ers tand
women like her.
I was one of tho se peo ple.
The mother I kno w is no t wea k. She was no t someo ne I could

env ision forgiving a man for mistrea ting her on multiple occasions .
But whi le writing thi s book and get ting int o the mind -set of Lily, I
quickly rea lized tha t it’s no t as black and whi te as it seem s from the
outside.
On more tha n one occasion whi le writing thi s, I want ed to cha ng e
the plotline. I didn’t want R yle to be who he was going to be bec ause I
ha d fallen in love with hi m in tho se firs t sev era l cha pters , just as Lily

ha d fallen in love with hi m. Just as my mother fel l in love with my
father.
The firs t inc ident bet ween R yle and Lily in the kitchen is wha t
ha ppened the firs t time my father ev er hi t my mothe r. She was
cooking a cassero le and he ha d been drink ing . He pulled the
cassero le out of the oven witho ut using a pot ho lder. She tho ught it

was funny and she laughed . The nex t thi ng she knew, he ha d hi t her
so ha rd she flew across the kitchen floor.
She cho se to forgive hi m for tha t one inc ident , bec ause hi s apology
and reg ret were bel iev able. Or at lea st bel iev able eno ugh tha t giving
hi m a sec ond cha nc e hu rt les s tha n lea ving with a broken hea rt would
ha ve.
Over time, the inc ident s tha t followed were similar to the firs t. My

father would rep ea ted ly sho w rem orse and promise to nev er do it
again. It fina lly got to a point where she knew hi s promises were
em pty, but she was a mother of two daught ers by then and ha d no
money to lea ve. And unl ike Lily, my mother didn’t ha ve a lot of
support. There were no local women’s shel ters . There was ver y little
government support back then. To lea ve mea nt risking no t ha ving a

roof over our hea ds, but to her it was bet ter tha n the altern ative.
My father passed away sev era l yea rs ago, when I was twent y-fiv e
yea rs old. He wasn’t the bes t father. He cert ainl y wasn’t the bes t
hu sband . But tha nk s to my mother, I was able to ha ve a ver y close