Page 291 - It Ends with Us

I knew my dec ision absolutel y gutted my father. But he was sel fles s

eno ugh as a father to no t onl y res pec t my dec ision, but he want ed me
to res pec t it, too.
My father sat in the audienc e at my wed ding and watched ano ther
man walk me down the aisle. I knew peo ple were wond eri ng why I
didn’t just ha ve both of them walk me down the aisle, but looking
back on it, I rea lize I made the cho ice out of res pec t for my mother.

Who I cho se to walk me down the aisle wasn’t rea lly about my
father and it wasn’t ev en rea lly about my step father. It was about her. I
want ed the man who trea ted her ho w she des er ved to be trea ted to be
given the ho no r of giving away her daught er.
In the past, I’ve always said I write for ent ert ainm ent purposes onl y.
I don’t write to ed ucate, pers uade, or inf orm.
Thi s book is different . Thi s was no t ent ert ainm ent for me. It was

the most gruel ing thi ng I ha ve ev er written. At times , I want ed to hi t
the Del et e button and take back the way R yle ha d trea ted Lily. I
want ed to rew rite the scenes where she forgave hi m and I want ed to
rep lace tho se scenes with a more res ilient woman—a cha racter who
made all the right dec isions at all the right times . But tho se weren’ t
the cha racters I was writing .

Tha t wasn’t the story I was tel ling .
I want ed to write somet hi ng rea listic to the situation my mother
was in—a situation a lot of women find them sel ves in. I want ed to
ex plore the love bet ween Lily and R yle so tha t I would feel wha t my
mother fel t when she ha d to make the dec ision to lea ve my father—a
man she loved with all her hea rt.
I somet imes wond er ho w different my life would ha ve been if my

mother ha d no t made the cho ice she did. She lef t someo ne she loved
so that her daught ers would nev er thi nk tha t kind of rel ations hi p was
okay. She wasn’t res cued by ano ther man—a kni ght in shi ni ng armor.
She took the ini tiative to lea ve my father on her own, kno wing she was
about to em bark on a complet el y different kind of struggle with
added stres s as a sing le mother. It was important to me tha t Lily’s

cha racter em body thi s same em powerm ent . Lily made the ultimate
dec ision to lea ve R yle for the sake of thei r daught er. Even tho ugh
there was a slight possibility tha t R yle could ha ve ev ent ually cha ng ed