Page 322 - The Truth Landscape Format 2020 1st Draft 19_01_2020

Personality And Character
Like appearance, we tend to form preferences for those who remind us of our parents (or others close to us through childhood) because of their personality and
character, sense of humour, likes and dislikes, etc.

Pheromones
The word "pheromone" comes from the Greek words pherein and hormone, meaning "excitement carrier".

In the animal world, pheromones are individual scent "prints" found in urine or sweat that dictate sexual behaviour and attract the opposite sex. They help
animals identify each other and choose a mate with an immune system different enough from their own to ensure healthy offspring.

The existence of human pheromones was discovered in 1986 by scientists in Philadelphia and its counterpart in France. They found these chemicals in human
sweat. There is evidence that smell is an important aspect of love (note the booming perfume industry).

The Greatest Love Requires The Greatest Courage

It doesn't take much courage to simply have a relationship. You choose to spend your time with someone, to have sex with him or her, perhaps
to live together. It does however, take courage to love your partner deeply, to not be merely a couple but to be true lovers, and to create a
conscious relationship together. The greatest love always requires the greatest courage.

If you measure the success of your relationship in terms of how comfortable it makes you feel, you may convince yourself that your relationship
is good because it doesn't challenge you, and confuse yourself that your challenging is unhealthy because it's creating wild surges of emotion. I'm not
saying that a relationship that is always painful is good for you, and you should stay with that partner—you shouldn't. When you develop the
courage to love deeply and consciously, you will find yourself feeling uncomfortable a lot of the time, as your relationship stretches you beyond
the boundaries of your comfort zone as you experience the changes essential to growth.

The depth and honesty of your love, and the more trust you create between you, the more your relationship will present you with the truth, and the more
uncomfortable you may become. Some time after a significant commitment is made in a relationship, such as moving in together, getting married or
having a baby or another baby, will usually bring with it a time of conflict and turmoil. Remember the Power Struggle referred to earlier in the chapter,
well here it is.

The Courage to Share Precious Moments

If loving deeply requires a certain degree of emotional courage, then sharing precious moments requires even more courage. Why?

The more precious moments you share together, the more difficult it will be for you to avoid the truths you may have denied or hidden
from in your relationship, the harder it will be to pretend things are “ok” when they're not, to convince yourself that you're being loved enough when Page322
you aren't, and to close your eyes to the unspoken problems in your relationship. We go to great lengths to avoid these precious moments as I call them,