Page 226 - e-Dinamik

We actually developed our own method, and our child seems to enjoy this
method better than the method suggested by our therapist. Whenever she is about to
experience meltdown (we just know it), I would sit down, looking straight into her eyes (even
when she fails to do, I would still search for her eyes and look straight). The first few seconds
may go by in silence, but as soon she catches my eyes, she will start to calm down and begin
“telling” (she still has problems with her communication, in fact, she is still unable to say out
things properly) what happens, or even what does she want. And since she is still unable to say
out things, she would just pin point to us, or even grab our hands and quickly and go to
wherever she wants to. We have been practising this method since she was about three (we
have been informed by her pediatrician the day she was born that she may develop cognitive
problems) and most of the time it worked. But she is growing up, she feels that she no longer
needs this. Now, she prefers to try to say out things, although things that she says may not be
exact and precise. But the point is, she has developed her self-confidence slowly. What’s more
is that she manages to walk up to people and try to establish contact, although she knows that
those people may not be able to understand what she is trying to say.

If this happens to you, how would you react? Would you just walk away from
them, while making faces (We have met people who make faces in front of us!)? Or would you
try your best to understand them?

An advice from us, embrace them. Celebrate the fact that they try to walk up to
you to talk, to probably to mingle or even make friends. Children with ASD or other disabilities
are curious in their own as “why they can’t understand us?” lower down your expectations
towards them, praise them for little good deed that they do, put trust in them. What is more
important in their life is that they know how to differentiate between good and bad, to be able to
take a good care of themselves. They may not be able to achieve more later in their life, but as
long as they know that they are appreciated and loved, they will do fine. Don’t wrap them so
tight just because they have disabilities, put your trust in them, make sure that they know that
whatever happens, they will always have you as their strongest sidekicks. Because if we don’t,
who else will do?

216