Page 70 - my SUCCESS! my CHOICE

Deepak Gupta my SUCCESS! my CHOICE
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He smiled at Linda as he reached Ron’s office. She returned an even bigger smile. No words

were necessary.

Ron was waiting for him. After the pleasantries, Ron asked, “Any learnings Dan?”

“Yes Ron. I had a Eureka moment. I realized that when people get into a relationship, their

individual spaces merge into a shared common emotional space that comprises of Control,

Empathy and Compassion. Relationships thrive in Empathy and Compassion space as both

partners can coexist there with trusted influence and selfless commitment. But Control space

is different; it has place just for one person and evokes egoistic persuasion. For relationship

to survive, the partners can choose to either leave it vacant or accept who will occupy it.

Trouble starts when both jostle to take control of the Control space. The consequent conflict

wrecks the relationship.”

Ron was listening awestruck, “This is a highly insightful learning Dan. I had not even

thought of it. To the best of my knowledge, no one has explored this angle before.” He paused

with his eyes fixed at some object beyond Dan.

“Profound! I like it a lot.” He murmured deep in thought, and then smiled like the one who

just found something highly valuable, “You have discovered the probable root cause of most

relationship failures Dan.”

“Thinking aloud, Control constricts and firewalls our domain, not allowing the other to

enter without jostling, as you describe it. When control is exercised in relationship of equals,

it awakens their ego to fight back.”