Page 78 - Likutei Tipshim
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Do you want to be mikayaim the mitzvah of ad dlo yada (drinking until               The Sculley and Sigourney Segula Institute is coming to Chicago. If                                                          קחשל שרדמה תיב
     you can't tell the difference between Baruch Mordechai and Arur Haman)             you want to bring more bracha, parnasah, and nachas into your life, but
     this Purim but can't stand the next day's  hangover? Does alcohol not re-          aren't really interested in putting forth any real effort, have we got the
     ally agree with your system, but you don't want to miss being mikayaim             segula for you. For those of you who aren't convinced that segulas                                    םירופ
     any of the mitzvos hayom? Yeshivas Haman Harasha has the answer. For               work, here is a segula you can test out for yourself.                                                       Humor Training Center
     a nominal donation of $18.00, we have young talmidei chachamim will-                                                                                                  Likutei Tipshim 2013
     ing to keep you in mind while they drink. Think of it, you support Torah           Segula for parnasah; Get a good paying job.                                        Volume Loud Number 1
     scholarship, and have the zechus of the mitzvah of ad dlo yoda ,with no            For more information check out our website. JustLikeMagic.com
     hangover. To reserve your designated drinker call 1-800-DRINKUP                    Mr. & Mrs. John Enright wishing the best of luck to their son Reed on              This Year’s Likutei Tipshim is sponsored by the 3 and 4th metatarsal
     With the success of filters for computers and smart phones, K9 filters is          the opening of his tutoring service. If your child is having trouble with          bone reminding people a little stress is nothing to get broken up over  .
     pleased to announce their latest innovation, a filter for your glasses. If         fundamental educational concepts be sure to think of Reed Enright.                 Disclaimer: We, at Lekutei Tipshim, wish to once again inform the pub-
     you don't want to see or perceive any evil, get K9 Ahora for your glasses          Mr. and Mrs. Wilberder wish their daughter, Samantha Olivia much                   lic that we are in no way affiliated, associated, or otherwise related to any
     today. www.zoldernitschaten.com                                                    success on starting  a new clothing line, S.O. Wilberder & Co.                     institution or organization currently publishing similar types of periodi-
                                                                                                                                                                           cals, weeklies, etc.
     The Healthy Eating Committee of Chicago is proud to  offer a lecture this          The Women’s Not Ready for Primetime Players will be putting on a                        Here in the diaspora, we call the Purim pastry,  a hamentaschen. The
     Sunday night by renown dietician Dr. Lotta Sugar. The title for her lec-           production of “No Soap Radio”.  Details To Follow. Sponsored by S.O.               origin of this word has a variety of  meanings, from  Haman's hat, to the
     ture is, "Food, an important part of a balanced diet". Be sure to come ear-        Wilberder & Co.                                                                    Yiddish Montashn (poppy seed pouch). But in Israel, they are referred to as
     ly and not miss any of her pearls of wisdom. Guaranteed to turn your diet          As a service to the community, we at Calling Post are inaugurating the             Oznei Haman, Haman's ears.                                                       It has come
     around 360 degrees.                                                                "Calling Post Uninvite".  You can now go through the Acheinu directo-              to our attention that ears aren't really shaped like triangles; half moons
                                                                                                                           ry  and  pick  out  those  people  you  just  can’t  have  at  your  simcha  or   “A good Hamentaschen is
                                                                                                                                                                                                       perhaps, or ovals but triangles? Come on.
     The community is invited to a special lecture on hazards around the                event.  We will call them and let them know: "This is a Calling Post               like mon from heaven.”            It behooves us to probe into the deeper
     house. Renowned expert Dan Juruss will discuss ways of keeping our                 Uninvite.  We  are  so  sorry  that  we  can’t  invite  you  to  our  upcoming                                 meaning of why they are called Oznei Haman.
     families safe.                                                                     simcha, but we just don’t have room for you. Otherwise, you can be                                             In researching this topic, we first thought to
     Many people in our community are facing tough financial times. As a                sure that you would be on our list.”  Don't worry about insulting them,            explore the socio-economic construct that gave birth to this name. But that
                                                                                                                                                                           was way too time consuming and truthfully nobody appreciates good re-
     result, they are turning to gambling R"L as an attempt at a quick fix. The         you weren't going to invite them anyway.                                           search these days any way. We checked Wikipedia and google, neither of
     Committee to Perpetuate the Holiness of the Jewish People is offering a            The Choshen V'Ephod Kollel would like to announce that there will be               which were very helpful. We tried opening  up a sefer ( a rectangular object
     series of seminars to help people cope and keep them from becoming                 no shiur this week on ribbis due to lack of interest  in the community.            similar in shape to a smart phone but bigger and thicker) but surprisingly,
     gamblers. If you would like to help underwrite the cost of these seminars                                                                                             with all the Torah being written nowadays, not one talmid chacham asks this
     please buy our raffle tickets. They are for sale online, in every shul lobby       In  memory  of  Sala  Shabati  and    Avremele  Melamid    by  Tevya  and          question (I guess they don't call them talmidei chachamim for nothing). In
     and  in Jewish stores throughout the community.                                          Golda.                                                                       truth, the answer lies in the 3 corner shape of the pastry. When someone
     First prize $1,000,000.00                                                          *********************************************************                          speaks, 3 things  happen. The speaker emits, the hearer hears, and the brain

     Our political representatives in Washington have heard our concern over            Likutei Tipshim is not now and has never been associated with any fine             processes. During Haman's entire life he did 2 of those things, speak and
     the problem of a big  unwieldy government and in response to your con-             institutions of higher learning in the city of Chicago or its environs.            hear, but his brain didn't process what was being said or what was really
     cerns they are forming a task force to investigate the possibility of mak-         Ideas? Comments? Send email to likutei-tipshim@juno.com                            happening. He refused to see H' hand in any of the events.  On Purim we eat
     ing a department that will manage all the other departments. You can rest                                                                                             oznei Haman by first biting off a corner, to represent how Haman removed
     easy that the Department of Departments will work tirelessly to make the           The contents  of this publication have been certified Torah free. May              his ability to understand and infer. Once there are only 2 corners left, the
     government more efficient.                                                         contain  some  trace  elements  of  gematria.  Written  in  a  facility  where     pastry now symbolizes Haman's obtuseness. We, therefore,  must complete-
                                                                                        people eat peanuts.                                                                ly devour it to fulfill the commandment of mechias Amalek ( or in this con-
     Jack and Jill Biotic thank their aunt for all her help during their past ill-                                                                                         text achilas Amalek).
     ness, and letting the community know that she is making her services               Money back guarantee: If this issue fails to produce at least one chuck-           Those of you who have kids in the "parsha" no doubt appreciate Dor Ye-
                                                                                        le and/or one smile, return to point of purchase for a fool refund.
     available to all that need it. If you aren't feeling well, call for Aunty Bio-                                                                                        shorim, With concern for the financial state of our community, we are
     tic.                                                                               THIS PUBLICATION IS STILL NOT A RECIPIENT OF THE JEW-                              pleased to announce a new organization, "Dor Ashirim".  Just have both
                                                                                        ISH FEDERATION OF METROPOLITAN CHICAGO
                                                                                                                                                                           sides submit a financial statement ( last year’s tax return will do) and we
                                                                                                                                                                           will analyze both families to make sure there will be financial harmony.

                                                                                                                                                                           All submissions will be held in the strictest confidence.
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