Page 93 - Likutei Tipshim

Actual shaylos from the Choshen V’Efod Kollel: Are you a mosad in desperate need of funds? Or are
you an avreich who has 3 chasunas to make in the Halachic Corner
Q: You can be yotzei Megilla reading if read in a foreign language if next 4 months? Is the thought of leaving your home
you understand it. The question was raised, does it have to be a “real” to travel across the ocean just to get insulted, dis- Zmanim for 5777 (2017 Ce)
language like French, Spanish, English or can you be yotzei with a dainful looks and barely enough money to pay for Daylight Savings time starts on Purim.
Megilla written in other street languages such as: Be sure to enjoy your shalach manos and set your scales back 10 lbs
your ticket making you anxious and depressed? SI
Pig Latin 1. Andyay ityay amecay otay asspay inyay ethay aysday (Shlichus International) has a talented team of thick Due to the mild winter this year, we at Likutei Tipshim were afraid that
ofyay Achashveroshyay ethay amesay Achashveroshyay owhay skinned, brazen performance artists that are ready people might have forgotten “Hilchos Snowfall D’Chicago.” As a public
uledray omfray oduHay otay ushCay, oneyay undredhay andyay and able to be your shaliach. Also if you are look- service, we will review a few of the most pertinent laws and customs.
entytway-evensay ovincespray. 2. Inyay osethay aysday, enwhay ing to make some extra money, travel and meet in- 1. There must be at least 6 inches of snow to claim the spot in front of
ingKay Achashveroshyay atsay onyay ishay oyalray onethray, teresting people, the life of a shaliach for a mesu- your house ( There is the sheeta of the Chazon Ish of 1.5 ft but most peo-
ichwhay asway inyay ushanShay ethay apitalcay. lach might just be for you. For more information ple aren’t that machmer and an open orthodox sheeta of 1/4 of an inch
and a chart of our reasonable rates or if you would has no basis in any earlier source, so shouldn’t be relied on).
Ebonics 1.Yo an' it came ta pass in da days o' Achashverosh da same
Achashverosh who ruled from Hodu ta Cush, one hundred an' twen- like to join our team, contact Rabbi Ichben A. N. 2. The spot should not be any longer than 15 ft with some saying up to
ty-seven provinces. 2. In those days, when King Achashverosh sat on Askin at kolyisroelchaverim.org and remember our 18 ft if you drive an SUV.
his royal throne, which wuz in Shushan da capital, don't make me motto “we take the strain and you get the gain”. 3.The most mehudar way of saving the spot, is with old metal folding
shank ya! ************************************ chairs and an old broom but bidiyeved, you can use some milk crates and
a shopping cart if you have gotten reshus from the store and the milk co.
Yeshivish 1. Oy! I have to tell you this mayse about Achashverosh, Do you find yourself impatient? Do you feel if you 4.As an extra hidur, we would urge people to consider WHAT IF you
you know the richtiger Achashverosh. He was the grouyse boss from were calmer, it would spread to the people around were the one to save your neighbor his spot as well?
Hodu till Cush 127 medinahs. 2. It was during that zman and the mel- you and make life much better? We are going to
ech sat on his throne in Shushan Habira, and believe me they didn’t share with you an amazing segula. Next time you ***********************************************************
THIS YEAR’S LIKUTEI TIPSHIM IS SPONSORED BY:
call it Shushan Ha’BEERa for nothing. are feeling impatient, say this tefila over and over
until the urge passes. H’ please grant me patience The Bored Directors of the Humor Training Center extend a mazel tov to
A: The Shulchan Aruch says the Megilla can be read B’laz which in bored members, Rabbi & Mrs. Ben Rollo and Mr. & Mrs. Jed Koster on
essence means the language “of the people”. If that is the language of and give it to me NOW. the upcoming wedding of their children. The community is invited to the
those people, then it is our conclusion that they can be yotzei with a ************************************ Rollo Koster sheva brachos this Wednesday at Great America.
Megilla written like that. Finally a nutrition label with information you can
use. As of Rosh Chodesh Nissan, The Israeli minis- The Humor Training Center’s Great Topics Shiur will be this Thursday
******************************************************* at the Red Onion at 12:35 - 1:15pm. Rabbi Asher Bara will be our guest
Committee in formation: With so many stores either not able to give try of health is instituting new labeling guidelines, speaker. Among the topics he will cover will be: Did you ever stop to
out plastic bags anymore or having to charge for them, the burden on All food labels must have not just calorie, vitamin think and forget to start again? Is it true that he who laughs last thinks
our community, especially those with large families, is enormous. and mineral content but also the appropriate bracha slowest?
The PB&J (plastic bags and justice) is looking for like minded citi- and amount necessary to require a bracha achrona.
zens to donate and/or distribute plastic bags “"When Congress ************************************ The Bubkis Institute invites all women to an interactive presentation on
to all the heimish stores in our community. makes a joke, it's a Public service announcement for those of our read- nutrition, from expert dietician Brandy Weine . Come hear about her
Dedication opportunities are available. Your law, and when they ers in Fairbanks Alaska. It is against the law to give newest books: If Tomatoes are Technically a Fruit, is Ketchup a Smooth-
memoriam, honorarium or message will be make a law, it's a beer to a moose. We are checking to see if you can ie? What Should I do if According to the BMI Chart I am too Short?
printed and proudly displayed throughout the joke." give a moose to a bear. Shamai House International is pleased to announce that this Purim,
community. To help with this cause, or ob- Shamai House on college campuses across the country will be providing
tain a list of the politicians who thought Will Rogers ***************************************** safe rooms during Megilla reading for all those who find the story too
charging for bags was a good idea go to www.pbj.org Support group forming: If you are, or know some- scary, violent or sexist. All rooms will come complete with coloring
one who is a compulsive talker, come to the next books and crayons. You can make a donation for this essential service
****************************************************** meeting of Anon Anon Anon for help. by going to our website at Snowflakes.edu.

Public service announcement from the CIA (Chumra Institute of *****************************************
America): Between Purim and Pesach , if you are carrying a sack of Intervention needed. If people say they just love the Calling all people of faith to support a member of our community who is
flour and your friend has a bottle of water, be careful not to give him smell of books, please pull them aside and ask them being sued for refusing to service an event that goes against his beliefs.
warm regards and if you do be sure to keep it under 18 minutes. if they know how reading works? Show your support for Ira Fuse.