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קחשל שרדמה תיב
Do your children have a hard time owning up to the things they have Announcing a new shiur on inyonim of tzniyus, given by world renown
done? The Chicago Parenting Initiative invites you to a lecture by famed tznius expert, Rebbitzen Sima Lev Wattyur-Wearing. יל וק
Russian moralist Yuri Sponsible.
Making a wedding? Having trouble getting your invitees to respond? םירופ
There are many different minhagim and stringencies that make us look ACME collection agency, the company you've come to count on for your Humor Training College
strange or unusual to other people. Learn how to fulfill your obligations accounts receivable is starting a wedding division. We start with a friend- Likutei Tipshim 2016 A member of the North Shore University Humor System
while trying to look rational (think swinging chickens over your head and ly call asking your invitees if they are coming to your wedding. If they Volume Loud Number 1 Official Sponsor of the 2016 Presidential Election
eating a huge kezayis of matza in a very short period of time). Dr. Lee, can't commit, we inform them they will be turned over to our legal dept.
the Emily Post of the halachic world, is offering a crash course on how to
be makpid on mitzvos in the modern world. When it comes to doing Guaranteed results. Check out our web site at: Disclaimer: We, at Lekutei Tipshim, wish to once again inform the public that we are in
mitzvos in public take the Norma Lee approach to life. www.HowHardIsItToSayYesOrNo.com no way affiliated, associated, or otherwise related to any institution or organization
Hakaras Hatov! A big thank you to the city of Evanston for their plastic currently publishing similar types of periodicals, weeklies, etc.

The Chicago Parenting Initiative is offering math help for your children. bag ban and the return of brown paper grocery bags. Thanks to you, we This year‟s Likutei Tipshim is brought to you by The City Council of Chicago.
We have brought in expert math Professor, Z. L. Wright PHD. See your are clearing hundreds of more acres of forests. We would like to announce the implementation of the new “Laugh Tax”. It will
children‟s test scores soar with the tried and true techniques of Dr. Zack Lumberjack Union Local 207 cost you 5 cents for every smirk, 10 for each smile and 50 cents for each laugh &
Lee Wright. Looking for an innovative answer to your problems? Can‟t see a good if you opt to throw this publication away you will be subject to the garbage tax.

The Inclusive Council of Touhy Ave. wishes to inform the public that way out of your situation? Order our Bina Yesayra Herbal Tea for that *******************************************************
upon investigation we are pleased to announce that every shul on Touhy special inspiration. It comes complete with a beautiful Yiddishe Cup.
is LGBT friendly. Everyone welcomes Litvaks, Galitzianers, Bresslovers WWW.smartkup.yid Actual shaylos from the Choshen V’Efod Kollel:
& Taymanim. Special shiur this Purim. The Shushaner Rebbe will be in town to dis- Q. I daven in a shul that requests all mispallalim turn off their cell phones

Announcing The Chicago Hashavas Avaidah Program. We would like to cuss some of the more esoteric aspects of Purim. We will explore before davening. I made a personal kabala that I would follow this minhag
welcome Rabbi Zeke N. Yeshallfind who will head this wonderful new “Giving your dog shalach manos” (after all he is man‟s best friend) and and turn off my phone before I start to daven. I went to daven mincha and
addition to our ongoing programs. “Can I be yotzei mishloach manos giving a salami to a vegetarian?” realized I forgot my phone at the office. Do I have to run back to the office
to turn off my phone before I daven or can I stay and daven anyway?
Join us this Motzei Shabbos for a presentation by Dr William Power on ****************************************************
meaningful ways we can improve our lives. Whether you are trying to Thoughts to Ponder: A. There are several issues that need to be explored in order to properly
improve physically or spiritually, you are sure to find practical advice answer your question.
from Dr. Will Power. Why do we sing meshanichnas adar to the tune of “Jump down turn 1. Does a personal kabala obligate a person in all cases or do we say that
around, pick a bale of cotton „?
Are children making too much noise in your shul? Master child psy- Why do you have to "put your two cents in"...but it's only a "penny for when the kabala was made, it was meant for usual situations? Is an unusual
chologists Dr. D. Aven and Dr. Sydney Downe are offering their exper- your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going? scenario ever part of the original kabala?
tise to parents & youth directors in our community. Come this Sunday. In memory of Yogi Berra, we present some Yogiisms: 2. Even if unusual situations were not part of the original kabala, neverthe-
Learn and be inspired by the amazing techniques of Drs. Syd Downe & You can observe a lot by watching. less, the bottom line is, you accepted to always turn off your phone. We
D. Aven. know that “m‟dvar sheker tirchuk”, you must avoid speaking untruths, and
The future ain't what it used to be
Congratulations to Warren Thomas Harding on opening his small appli- In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice a “man‟s word is his word”.
ance insurance company. Make sure your appliances are covered. Con- there is. After much debate, the Rosh Kollel Rabbi Isser Hetar feels you have 2
tact Warren T. It was impossible to get a conversation going, everybody was talking too lechatchila options. Preferably, call your office and have someone turn off
Local high-tech startup has an immediate opening for a Director of much your phone for you. If that isn‟t possible, you can sell your phone to a goy
Social Media. Must be intimately familiar with all the latest trends in dig- *********************************************************** for the duration of the davening.
ital marketing and online media, social networking, high-tech tools, Likutei Tipshim is not now and has never been associated with any fine institutions of ************************************************************************
gadgets, and applications. Please submit typewritten resume (double- higher learning in the city of Chicago or its environs. It's not too late: Join the 3 in 1 initiative. You can be mikayim 3 mitzvos
spaced) to 1234 Main Street, Old School, IL or fax to BR7-4657. Ideas? Comments? Send email to likutei-tipshim@juno.com all at the same time with The Chicago Jewish Poverty Initiative Edible
The contents of this publication have been certified Torah free. May contain some trace
FADD. Fathers Against Distracted Driving is starting a crowd sourcing elements of gematria. Written in a facility where people eat peanuts. Purim Cards. The revenue collected from these cards will be distributed to
drive to install a horn on all stoplights in the area. Now, the same second Money back guarantee: If this issue fails to produce at least one chuckle and/or one the poor on Purim. Being edible, if you give two, you can also fulfill the
the light turns green, it will honk, alerting all drivers to stop texting and smile, return to point of purchase for a fool refund. mizva of mishloach manos. They can then eat it and voila - it is a Purim
seuda as well. Now you can really put your money where your mouth is.
start driving. THIS PUBLICATION IS STILL NOT A RECIPIENT OF THE JEWISH Available in Milchig, Fleishig, Pareve, Vegan & Gluten Free .
FEDERATION OF METROPOLITAN CHICAGO www.EatYourWords.com