Page 8 - April 2023 CW Magazine

Spousal Buy-In: Is It

an Essential Need?

By Buddy Thornton

You've decided being a housewife or employee is "just not
enough." You are nearing the starting line for your share of
entrepreneurship. But, when you tell your husband you are
taking the business ownership plunge, "You get crickets or
frowns." Now what?

In the conflict arena, lack of support sits in or near the
front row. When it's women not supporting their
husbands, most men take a "take it or leave it" stance.
Nothing changes as long as the bills get paid, and
significant life choices remain relatively normal. But, let
the woman seek ownership without spousal buy-in, and
all-out household conflict erupts. Not always, but how
many of you can relate to some form of this scenario?

Let's explore some ways to change the narrative.
Communication, usually avoided, minimized, or lacking, is
dead center in this story. Learning and using effective
communication is a deal-maker between spouses. First, be
open and direct about your choices and the why. People
often forget to include honesty, especially about time and
financial considerations surrounding a new business. Plus,
sharing, ego-massaging, and how you intend to handle
the inevitable mistakes should be explored.

Men generally want power and prestige as they glide up
the pecking order of life; women usually want security,
emotional and otherwise. So, when you, a woman with
competency and ambition, shift to entrepreneurship, your
choice threatens your significant other's status quo,
psychologically and tangibly. Yes, other factors are in play,
but research shows this is the primary reason a male
partner fails to engage in the buy-in process. Organically,
biology drives an expectation bias.

8 I www.thecontemporarywoman.com THE CONTEMPORARY WOMAN MAGAZINE