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DARE TO BE A.L.I.V.E. - DON’T BE A D.A.S.H.
Primary activating events are easily identi ed events that block our
G
important Goals ( ). They usually occur (or we think they may occur) before
we use them to create an emotional problem, for example: experiencing a
divorce, losing a job, learning that you have a disease, or thinking that these
Adversities may happen. These primary Activating Events are usually things
that happen in a certain place and time; and under certain conditions.
Example: “I came late to work, my boss yelled at me, I yelled back, and he
red me.”
Repeated Activating Events are ongoing problem situations that keep
occurring. To perceive what your repeated Activating Event is, you “take a
sample”. Taking a sample means identifying some particular times the
events occurred. Notice what event or conditions “set on’ the Adversity. For
example, consider a couple that is continuously ghting. A few speci c
examples of a typical ght can be used as a sample. You can look at a
speci c Activating Event for one ght or for several ghts.
Success and Failure
Another aspect of your Belief System involves damning yourself, others, and
situations. When putting yourself and other people down you
overgeneralize. For example, “I have failed at a task, therefore I am a failure.”
With this kind of illogical thinking, you may easily also conclude that because
you are a failure you have to keep failing; and this illogical belief may help you
create a self-ful lling prophecy and help you actually fail.
Actually, people fail at particular tasks for speci c reasons, not because they
are failures.
Even the person who has failed at almost every task has done reasonably
well at something and probably succeeded at several things! And when
succeeding, will this person call himself or herself a success? If so, that is just
as wrong as labeling himself or herself a failure for failing at something.
The truth is that we are neither saints nor sinners, neither successes nor
failures. We are error-prone human beings, who often fail, and often succeed.
ALIVE CODE
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