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Rabbi Chayim Friedlander # רדנלדירפ םייח ברה
A Peaceful Home ךלהא םולש יכ תעדיו סרטנוק
Chapter 1 - Lesson 4 ג רמאמ - פֶּא ֶר ר ִר ִׁ
Chapter 1 - Lesson 4 ל" ַצ ַז ט ְנ ַלּ ַסּ ֶמ י"רגה ?ה ִלּ ֵא ל ָכ ְבּ ת ַח ַרּט אי ֶה ה ָמ לי ֶב ְֶ ֶבוּ י ֶמ

אוּה םי ֶע ָט אוּה ה ָל ְשּׁ ֶבּ ִֶ ר ָר ָמּ ַה ִֶ ה ָשּׁ ֶא ָל ר ַמּל :ר ֵמּא הָי ָה
A practical approach to understanding the role of a
woman’s emotions. ם" ַבּ ְמ ַר ָה ל ַע ּלּ ִֶ ץוּר ֵתּ ַה ִֶ ה ָבי ְֶֶי ֶאֹר ְל םי ֶר ְמּא ִֶ ּמ ְכּ
רוּב ֲע ה ָני ֶכ ְמ ה ָשּׁ ֶא ָה ִֶ "רוּע ֶשּׁ" ַה וּה ִז - ר ָר ָמּ ַה י ֶכּ ,א ָל ְפ ֶנ אוּה
Chazal have pointed out an advantage to the control of emotions ל ַע ה ָר ָע ִה ַעי ֶמ ְֶ ֶה ת ַח ַא ם ַע ַׁ אלֹ ף ַא ִֶ ל ַע ַב ְבּ הֹ ִש ֲע ַמ !הּ ָל ְע ַבּ
(Gemara Berachot 10b) “A woman perceives guests more acutely
than a man.” In order to decide whether or not it is appropriate ה ָסי ֶנ ְכ ֶה ּתּ ְֶ ֶא ִֶ ה ָר ָר ת ַח ַא ם ַע ַׁ .ע ַר ְל אלֹ ְו בּט ְל אלֹ ,ל ִכֹא ָה
to extend hospitality to that guest one must know him thoroughly ה ִפ ָקּ ַה ת ִא ה ָת ֶָ ל ַע ַבּ ַה .ר ָכּ ֻס םּר ְמ ֶבּ ח ַל ִמ ה ִפ ָקּ ַה ל ִפ ֵס ךְּת ְל
to gather information about him, and based on that information
evaluate it and make a decision. However, the wife’s decision rests אלֹ ה ִז ָכּ ר ָב ָדּ וּלּ ֶפ ֲא - ה ָשּׁ ֶא ָה תוּנ ָל ְב ַס ה ָע ְר ָׁ פא ָכּ .בי ֶג ָה ְל י ֶל ְבּ
on her feelings and emotions, and she has no need to be guided !?ת ַח ַרּט אי ֶה ה ָמ לי ֶב ְֶ ֶבּ פ ֵכּ ם ֶא ,ּל ת ַׁ ְכ ֶא
by the rules of logic. She is very likely to say after only a brief
meeting – It’s worthwhile to get acquainted with this person, or .ה ָרּתּ י ֵר ְב ֶד ְל ה ָחי ֶשּׂ ַה ךְ ִֶ ִמ ְבּ םי ֶר ְבּע ,םי ֶֶ ָגּ ְפ ֶנ םיִכרְֵבַאֶשְׁכּ
the opposite. If she was asked “Could you explain the rationale
for your decision,” she would answer “I have a feeling about this” ת ִבּ ִס ֻמ ה ָחי ֶשּׂ ַה ִֶ ֵֶי ,תֶּ ָגּ ְפ ֶנ ם ִהי ֵתֶּ ְנּ ִֶ ְכּ ,א ָסי ֶגּ ךְ ַדי ֶא ֵמ
– meaning, she made her decision based on her intuition. In this םי ֶל ָע ְבּ ַה וּל ְכּ ַתּ ְסֶי ל ַא .פ ִהי ֵני ֵבּ תּגּ ֻע ְו םי ֶל ָכ ֲא ַמ י ֵמ ְֶ ְר ֶמ ת ַפ ָל ְח ַה ְל
context as well the wife is a helpmate to her husband –with her
emotional advantage she compliments her husband. ה ִז י ֵר ֲה "!?ה ָחיֹ ֶש ְל אֹ ֵשּנ ה ִז ם ֶא ַה" :וּרי ֶעָי ּא ,ר ָב ָדּ ַה ל ַע זוּב ְבּ
Because of her emotion-based sense of intuition she has a simple תוּבי ֶֶ ֲח ַו פָי ְנ ֶע אֹצ ְמ ֶל פ ָתּא ךְ ַר ָבּ ְתֶי 'ה פ ַנ ָח ּבּ ִֶ םי ֶֶ ָנּ ַה ע ַב ִט
faith in Hashem which is pure and rooted in the depths of her feelings, .רוּׁ ֶס פ ִה ָבּ אֹצ ְמ ֶל ְו ,תֶי ַבּ ַה תּדּב ֲע ַבּ
and she is not guided by analytical logic. This is a quote from
the sefer Oznayim L’Torah authored by the Gaon Rabbi Zalman םי ֶד ָח ְׁ ַה ם ֵה ה ָשּׁ ֶא ָה ל ִצ ֵא ֶ ִג ִר ָה ת ַטי ֶל ְשּׁ ֶמ ַע ֵבּנּ ַה ף ָסּנ רָבָדּ
Sorotzkin ZT”L “Feelings of the heart and an understanding that is
based on them, in this regard a woman is superior to a man because ה ָשּׁ ֶא ָה ְו ,ה ָתְי ַבּ ַה ַעי ֶגּ ַה ְל ר ֵח ַא ְמ ד ִלִיּ ַה ּא ל ַע ַבּ ַה .םי ֶנּשּׁ ַה
a woman’s feelings are more acutely developed than the feelings ַעי ֶגּ ַמ ל ַע ַבּ ַה ִֶ ְכּ .ר ֵתּי ְבּ ַעוּר ָגּ ַל ר ָב ְכּ ת ִֶ ִֶּח ְו ד ַח ַׁ ֶמ ה ָגּמ ְנ
of a man. A woman with an understanding heart and developed
feelings is more capable than a man to know The-One-Who-Spoke- ל ַע תּנוּל ְת ֶבּ וי ָנ ָׁ ת ִא ת ִל ִבּ ַר ְמ ה ָשּׁ ֶא ָה ,ה ָתְי ַבּ ַה ףּס ףּס
and-Created-the-World.” With her pure faith that is an integral ז ֵגּ ַר ְת ֶה ְל ל ַע ַבּ ַה לוּל ָע ל ֵצּ ַנ ְת ֶה ְל םּר ְמ ֶבּ .הּ ָל ם ַר ָגּ ִֶ םי ֶד ָח ְׁ ַה
part of her nature the wife more than her husband will stand strong
and will not collapse in times of the pressures of the difficulties of ר ַׁ ְס ֶמ ה ָר ָר י ֵר ֲה .םי ֶד ָח ְׁ ַל תּיּ ֶנּי ְג ִה תּבּ ֶס פי ֵא י ֵר ֲה , ָהי ִל ָע
life’s tests, as Chazal have said (in Gemara Sotah 11b) that in Egypt ּא דוּמּ ֶל ְבּ וּר ְבּ ֶד ְו ,וּה ִֶי ֶמ ֶ ַג ָׁ י ֶכּ ךְ ִר ִדּ ַבּ ב ֵכּ ַע ְת ֶה ִֶ םי ֶמ ָע ְׁ
the women gave strength to the men – and because of the merit of
the righteous women of that generation we were redeemed out of ר ֵתּי ְבּ ַעוּר ָגּ ַל ֶֶֹ ֲח ַל ה ָמ ָל ְו .ה ִׁ ֻצ ְמ ַה ֵמ ר ָח ֻא ְמ ּדוּמּ ֶל ת ִא ר ַמ ָגּ
Egypt.” ה ָנּ ַט ְר אי ֶה ךְ ָכ ְל תוּרי ֶב ְסּ ַה י ֵר ֲה ,ךְ ִר ִדּ ַבּ ה ָנוּא ְתּ ה ָת ְר ָקּ ִֶ -

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