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Rabbi Chayim Friedlander 2 רדנלדירפ םייח ברה # 280818_efi-ab - 280818_efi-ab | 2 - A | 18-08-28 | 11:06:24 | SR:-- | Black 280818_efi-
A Peaceful Home ךלהא םולש יכ תעדיו סרטנוק
Chapter 1 - Lesson 3 ג רמאמ - פֶּא ֶר ר ִר ִׁ

husband because he is not sensitive to her concerns. That is how ה ָשּׁ ֶא ָה ,א ָסי ֶגּ ךְ ַדי ֶא ֵמ .ה ִז ָל ֶֶֹ ֲח ַל ךְי ֶר ָצ אלֹּ ִֶ ךְ ָכּ ,ר ֵתּי ְבּ
tensions arise, as they come from a lack of understanding of mutual
concerns. The husband must understand clearly that her fears are א ָבּ ִֶ ח ַת ִמ ר ָצּנ ךְ ָכ ְו .הּ ֶָ ְפ ַנ ְל פי ֶב ֵמ ּני ֵא ִֶ הּ ָל ֲע ַבּ ל ַע ת ִז ִגּ ֻר ְמ
not based on logic, rather they stem from her emotions. The more םי ֶנ ָגּ ֻע ְמ ם ָני ֵא םי ֶד ָח ְׁ ִֶ ת ַע ַד ָל ל ַע ַבּ ַה ל ַע .תי ֶד ָד ֲה ה ָנ ָב ֲה י ֶא ֵמ
emotions play on her, the more her fears become real and increase.
The husband should have accepted the great worry of his wife as פ ֵכּ ,ר ֵתּי ט ֵלֶּ ֶ ִג ִר ָה ִֶ ל ָכ ְכּ .ֶ ִג ִר ָה ֵמ םי ֶע ְבּנ א ָלּ ִא ,פּי ָגּ ֶה ַבּ
a compliment. In any event it is forbidden for the husband to get ה ָלּד ְגּ ַה ה ָג ָא ְדּ ַה ת ִא ל ֵבּ ַר ְל ךְי ֶר ָצ הָי ָה ל ַע ַבּ ַה .םי ֶל ֵד ְגּ םי ֶד ָח ְׁ ַה
angry at his wife, rather, he must understand her concerns. This
obligates him not to be late, and if something happens to delay him ז ֵגּ ַר ְת ֶה ְל ּל רוּס ָא םי ֶנ ָׁ ל ָכּ ל ַע .ה ָא ָמ ְח ַמ ְכּ ּמּל ְֶ ֶל ּתּ ְֶ ֶא ל ִֶ
from returning home on time he must find some way to inform his .ר ֵח ַא ְל אלֹּ ִֶ ּתּא בֵיּ ַח ְמ ה ִז .הּ ֶָ ְפ ַנ ְל פי ֶב ָה ְל וי ָל ָע א ָלּ ִא , ָהי ִל ָע
wife by telephone, and if they have no phone in the house then he ֹש ֵׁ ַח ְל ךְי ֶר ָצ ,פ ַמ ְזּ ַבּ רֹז ֲח ַלּ ֶמ ּתּא ב ֵכּ ַע ְמ ה ָמ ר ַב ְדּ ִֶ ה ִרּר ם ֶא ְו
should contact a neighbor and ask them to tell her that he will be
late getting home. By doing this he will relieve his wife of her ם ִה ָל פי ֵא ם ֶא ְו ,פּפ ִל ִט י ֵדְי ל ַע ּתּ ְֶ ֶא ְל ַעי ֶדּה ְל תוּר ֶָ ְפ ִא
anxieties, and more than this his wife will be grateful to him for ל ַע .הּ ָל ַעי ֶדּה ְל ם ֶָ ְקּ ַב ְלוּ םי ֶנ ֵכ ְשּׁ ַל פ ֵׁ ְל ַט ְל ר ֶָ ְפ ִא י ַז ֲא ,פּפ ִל ִט
being considerate of her.
הִי ְה ֶתּ ּתּ ְֶ ֶא ,פ ֵכּ ל ַע ר ִתִי .םי ֶד ָח ְׁ ּתּ ְֶ ֶא ֵמ ַע ֵנּמ אוּה ה ִז י ֵדְי
It is also possible that his wife has fears of all kinds of small animals
and tiny things (for example, mice or roaches), or she might be .הּ ָבּ ב ֵשּׁ ַח ְת ֶמ אוּה ִֶ ל ַע ּל ה ָדּתּ ת ַרי ֶס ֲא
disgusted seeing a wound, or from other things that cause her to
shudder. The husband should not chide her telling her that her תּנּ ַט ְר תּיּ ַח י ֵני ֶמ ל ָכּ ֶמ םי ֶד ָח ְׁ ּתּ ְֶ ֶא ְל ֵֶיּ ִֶ פ ֵכ ָתֶּי ,פ ֵכ וֹמְכּ
fears are appropriate to little children but not to intelligent adults.
These kinds of fears are based on her nature which is controlled םי ֶר ֵח ֲא םי ֶר ָב ְדּ ֶמ ּא ע ַצ ִׁ תַיּ ֶא ְר ֵמ ת ִל ִע ְג ֶנ אי ֶה ּא ,תּנּ ַט ְנ ַט ְרוּ
by her emotions, and he must take her fears and sensitivities into ל ַע הּ ָתּא ַחי ֶכּה ְל ל ַע ַבּ ַה ה ִסּ ַנְי ל ַא .ה ָל ָח ְל ַח הּ ָבּ םי ֶר ְרּע ְמ ַה
consideration and not demand that she change her nature.
ם ָד ָא ְל אלֹ ל ָב ֲא ,םי ֶנּ ַט ְר םי ֶד ָלי ֶל םי ֶמי ֶא ְת ַמ ה ִלּ ֵא םי ֶד ָח ְׁ ִֶ תאֹז
הּ ָבּ ִֶ הּ ָת ָנוּכ ְת ֶבּ םי ֶנ ָגּ ֻע ְמ ה ִלּ ֵא םי ֶד ָח ְׁ י ֵר ֲה .ל ִכֹ ֵש ל ַע ַבּ ר ָגּ ֻב ְמ

ת ִא ה ִנּ ֶַ ְתּ ִֶ ַעֹבּ ְת ֶל אלֹ ְו ,הּ ָבּ ב ֵשּׁ ַח ְת ֶה ְל ךְי ֶר ָצ ְו ,ֶ ִג ִר ָה ט ֵלֶּ
.הּ ָע ְב ֶט

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