Page 34 - San Diego Woman interactive pdf

Women of Distinction

not for her young son. Because The second tip she suggests
even though they are young, is that before you can love any-
studies show that they are one, you need to love yourself.
absorbing everything around “A big step is self-love. Learn
them. They are extremely about yourself. If you are un-
perceptive. comfortable to be alone, that's
Sometimes it is necessary a problem. That means you
for Annie to have her clients don't like yourself enough to be
step back out of the situation alone. Find a way to fall back
they are in and try to view in love with yourself, think of
it from a totally different your childhood, what activities
perspective. “I will ask them if did you like to do it, once you
this was your daughter, and she discover them start doing them
told you that this was going on again. Find the things that
in her relationship, or in any bring you joy. Not joy for your
physically or emotionally de- parents, or your significant
structive situation, I guarantee other, not what you think your
you the first thing you would kids want. What is it you want?
say is run, get out, don’t look The last tip is to set goals
back.” for yourself. Start with small,
After a few sessions. manageable goals. You can
Annie’s client started writing work your way up from there.
things down at her suggestion Focus on the positive, not the
and looking at the positive as- negative, and always remember
pects of her life and her future, all the things in your life for
and she felt empowered enough which you are grateful?
to make the tough choice that Annie makes sure that
she knew in the long run was all her clients know one very
the right choice. important thing. “I'm here
Over time Annie has seen to guide you, I'm not here to
that there is one turning point judge you. I care and respect
in destructive situations wheth- you enough to be upfront with
er it be a bad relationship, a you and tell you what I, as an
drug or alcohol addiction. outsider, think will benefit you.
“They have to want it more They may have heard the same
than I do. I can’t want them to thing for years from relatives or
heal more than they do. Which friends, but it's not as effective as
means they must be willing to when it comes from a profes-
do the necessary work to make sional. I'm an outside perspec-
it happen. It’s not easy, but if tive who doesn’t know both
they want it bad enough, they sides. I am on your side, so I can
will succeed.” help you make a decision that is
I asked Annie what tips only based on your needs.”
would she give to women stuck In closing, Annie had an
in a stress cycle? “Number one equally powerful statement to
seek support. It is a very lonely share with our readers. “We
journey, especially if you are often get a lot of input from
trying to go it alone. Confide those around us on what we
in someone you can trust and should or shouldn’t do, and we
search out help. There are are not really sure who to listen
unlimited resources available. to. One quote I really like, and
Educate yourself and start I share with my clients is this
with the free things. There are ‘Never take criticism from
so many websites, podcasts, someone you wouldn’t go to for
books, and blogs. advice.”

If you would like to learn more or set up an appointment
go to Annie’s website at www.anniedelre.com or email her
annie@anniedelre.com

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