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Brain booster

At its core, conflict is perceived by the brain as a threat. Conflict and threat activate the limbic, or
emotional, system of the brain and very quickly you may feel your heart rate, breathing, or temperature
change. Those are the signs that stress hormones like cortisol have been released into your system.
There is a chain reaction effect in play once your fight, flight, or freeze response is engaged. If the
amygdala, or emotional response center, becomes “hijacked,” your prefrontal cortex (center of rational
thinking and decision making) is impaired. You might not hear things correctly or you might misinterpret
what people say. Based on how the brain works, it’s easy to see why conflicts get so heated so quickly.
Why arguments take illogical turns for the worse. But as emotional intelligence expert Daniel Goleman
explains, you don’t have to surrender to an amygdala hijack. When you are aware of what’s happening
and name it, you begin to regain control—of your emotions, your decisions, your responses. The old
“count to 10” trick still stands. Take the time you need to get your prefrontal cortex back in the driver’s
seat.

Tips to develop Manages conflict
1. Too much peace and harmony? Encourage healthy conflict. A perfectly peaceful and harmonious
workplace isn’t always a good thing. When people are focused on keeping the peace, they can
become too agreeable, afraid to rock the boat, complacent. Research shows that the single greatest
predictor of poor company performance is complacency. Every organization needs a healthy dose of
dissent. Encourage others to challenge the status quo and vocalize where things aren’t working. To
put their views on the table. Engage in debate. To fight for things they truly believe in, things that
could be game changing. Ignite their imagination. Encourage them to think about bold and wide-
reaching possibilities. Support them to let go of the past, resist apportioning blame, and focus their
energy on looking at the road ahead. To use conflict productively. Don’t allow them to fight dirty or
behave destructively. Look for signs that others are trying to avoid conflict. Do they continually
change the subject? Put off the conversation until a later date. Remind them that productive conflict is
a necessary step in the journey toward a better future. That working through rough patches helps to
reinforce the collective effort and commitment of everyone.

2. Not getting your message through? Deliver clear, problem-focused communication. Follow the
rule of equity: Explain your thinking and ask them to explain theirs. Be able to state their position as
clearly as they do whether you agree or not; give it legitimacy. Separate facts from opinions and
assumptions. Generate a variety of possibilities first rather than stake out positions. Keep your
speaking to 30–60 second bursts. Don’t give the other side the impression you’re lecturing or
criticizing them. Explain objectively why you hold a view; ask the other side to do the same. Ask lots
of questions, make fewer statements. Identify interests behind positions; ask them why they hold
them or why they wouldn’t want to do something. Always restate their position to their satisfaction
before offering a response.

3. Unsure of the culture? Watch and do as the locals do. Most cultures have a unique way of
handling difficult situations. In some cultures, direct confrontation is a no-no, while in others,
confrontation is expected and accepted. In some cultures, an intermediary is used to deliver tough

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