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4. The receipt of too much information creates confusion  and
                       overload, causing individuals to act without being certain about what
                       is desired or expected.
                       5. Frequent changes in direction, creating  confusion  and  multiple

                       shifts in appropriate response, making it difficult to determine what
                       would be a clear action to take.


               Managing Conflict

               It is possible to ensure that the process of managing conflict is as positive as

               possible by sticking to the following guidelines:           172

                   •  Make sure  that good  relationships are  the first  priority:  As far as
                       possible, make sure that you treat the other calmly and that you try to
                       build mutual respect. Do your best to be courteous to one  another

                       and remain constructive under pressure.           173
                   •  Make conflict  resolution the priority rather than winning or
                       "being right."  Maintaining  and strengthening the relationship,
                       rather than “winning” the argument, should always be your first
                       priority. Be respectful of the other person and his or her viewpoint.
                   •  Keep people  and problems separate:  Focus  on what happened,

                       not who caused it.  Recognize that in many cases the other person
                       is not just "being difficult;" real and valid differences can lie behind
                       adversarial positions. By separating the problem from the person,
                       real  issues  can  be  debated  without  damaging  working
                       relationships. By listening carefully you'll most-likely understand
                       why the person is adopting his or her position.

                   •  Listen for what is felt as well as said. When we listen we connect
                       more deeply to our own needs and emotions, and to those of other
                       people. Listening also strengthens us, informs us, and makes it easier
                       for others to hear us when it's our turn to speak.  To solve a problem
                       effectively you have to understand where the other person is coming

                       from before defending your own position.
                   •  Set out the "facts":  Agree and establish the objective, observable
                       aspects of the conflict that is likely to have an impact on the decision.


               172  http://www.helpguide.org/mental/eq8_conflict_resolution.htm.
               173  http://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/newLDR_81.htm.

               David Kolzow                                                                          157
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