Page 303 - Reason To Sing by Kelita Haverland

Chapter Forty-Seven

harsh and I’m really sorry. I am. I’m just so, so sorry. I’ve been
messed up. I never should have said that. I didn’t mean it.”
So now he tells me that? After a whole year of me believing
he doesn’t love me, now he’s telling me he does? He’s been
having an affair but he still loves me? I honestly don’t know
what to believe or think.
“I think you’re really confused, Gord, but I just can’t have
any more lying. From now on everything is out in the open.
No matter what happens, no more lying. I can’t deal with it
anymore. I just won’t.”
“I know. No more. I get that.” He sounds hopeful.
I decide to change the subject. Maybe beating a wounded
horse to death in this moment is not the best idea. “I miss
Keldon like crazy,” I admit as I try to end the call on a bit of
an up note. “Can you please give him a big hug for me and lots
of kisses?”
“Of course I can.” There is another pause and I immediately
start to panic, wondering what final injury he might inflict.
“Before you go, do you have any idea when you think you
might be coming home?” His voice is again hopeful which lifts
my heart considerably.
“I’m not sure right now.” I truly am not. As much as I long
to see my son and sort things out with my husband, I don’t feel
quite strong enough to go there yet. “Maybe in a few days. I’ll
let you know.”
“Okay,” he sounds relieved. “Just give me a call when you
decide and I’ll come and pick you up from the train.”
Funny, I don’t really want to end the call. I don’t want to stop
talking. I don’t want to lose my husband. I just want to wake up
from this nightmare and have my beautiful family back, with
no affair and no lies and no cheating and no suffering.
We say our good-byes and hang up. I lay back on the bed.

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