Page 392 - Under the Cover of Darkness

in terms of my Fibromyalgia and anxiety and depression.
Autumn and Winter can be tough going with chronic
pain conditions and mental illness that are affect by lack
of daylight, lack of sunshine, cold damp climate. I will
keep trying to find coping strategies.

6 September 2015 —
God almighty, I know this is a bit of an old hat argument
and there’s a lot more to it than the simplified comment
I’m going to make BUT I was gutted when I found out I
couldn’t have a baby after the chemo - I have always
waited ‘til I’m as stable emotionally, health wise,
financially n everything else before I would bring a baby
into the world but now it turns out I left it too late.
Meanwhile there’s a girl on TV 5 months pregnant by a
possibility of a number of fathers physically fighting and
screaming I don’t ****ing give a **** I wanted to get rid
of it anyway" Oh how lovely. What a lucky little baby
arriving into that life.

6 September 2015 —
If I have 1 more hot flush that ruins my hair, clothes and
make up at the most inconvenient time I think I’m going
to spontaneously combust in my own F***ING
ANGER!!!!
I’m cold all the time, really bad circulation - my hands n
feet go black I’m so cold sometimes but these hot flushes
aren’t even any help. You just burn for about 20 seconds
and go beetroot red and absolutely pour with sweat then
it passes and your left with make-up dripping down your
face, cold, wet clothes plastered to you and shivering. Oh
the glamour of it all!