Page 422 - Under the Cover of Darkness
P. 422

doodle  freely  rather  than  working  on  commissioned
            pieces.  I  did  this  in  bed  on  my  little  portable  drawing
            board.

           31 December 2015 —
           This  is  my  FREE,  5  WEEK  PSYCHIC  READING  for
            YOU for JANUARY 2016!
           I  predict  at  the  start  of  2016  you  will  subscribe  to  a
            magazine where the 1st issue is 99p with a free binder but
            subsequent  issues  are  6.99  and  after  realizing  you  will
            need to spend £56,542.99 to complete the collection and
            finish  crocheting a  WWII  battleship  in  organic  noodles
            you will cancel your subscription.
           You  will  binge  buy  cleaning  products  and  storage  boxes
            from Costco/Tesco/Wilko & Co and start clearing that
            junk draw out. This year you are going to be organized
            and streamline your life! You will then end up spending 3
            hours on the kitchen floor staring at old photographs and
            reminiscing before shoving it all back into the drawer and
            using the storage boxes for all the novelty socks and fruit
            fragranced bubble bath you got for Christmas.
           You will chuck your fags/chocolate/alcohol in the garbage
            and buy a fridge full of organic fruit and veg - some of
            which you don’t even know how to use...a week later you
            will have a refrigerator full off vegetables growing new
            vegetables and various types of fungus. You’ll use those
            Argos vouchers to buy a juicer and attempt to salvage as
            many  fruits  n  veggies  before  they  go  out  of  date  by
            blending them into "delicious" smoothies. No they really
            do taste quite nice if you use a straw and don’t look at it
            and  try  not  to  breathe  through  your  nose cos  it  smells
            worse - than it looks worse - than it tastes. *Eventually
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