Page 92 - Orwell, George - Nineteen eighty-four -bilingüe [pdf]

George Orwell 1 9 8 4 91

horrible way you can imagine, pulled up her skirt. terrible que se puede imaginar, se levantó la
I— falda. Yo...

He saw himself standing there in the dim Se vio a sí mismo de pie en la mortecina luz con
lamplight, with the smell of bugs and cheap scent el olor a cucarachas y a perfume barato, y en su
in his nostrils, and in his heart a feeling of defeat corazón brotó un resentimiento que incluso en
and resentment which even at that moment was aquel instante se mezclaba con el recuerdo del
mixed up with the thought ofKatharine's white blanco cuerpo de Katharine, frígido para siempre
body, frozen for ever by the hypnotic power of the por el hipnótico poder del Partido. ¿Por qué tenía
Party. Why did it always have to be like this? Why que ser siempre así? ¿No podía él disponer de una
could he not have a woman of his own instead of mujer propia en vez de estas furcias a intervalos
these filthy scuffles at intervals of years? But a real de varios años? Pero un asunto amoroso de
love affair was an almost unthinkable event. The verdad era una fantasía irrealizable. Las mujeres
women of the Party were all alike. Chastity was as del Partido eran todas iguales. La castidad estaba
deep ingrained in them as Party loyalty. By careful tan arraigada en ellas como la lealtad al Partido.
early conditioning, by games and cold water, by Por la educación que habían recibido en su
the rubbish that was dinned into them at school infancia, por los juegos y las duchas de agua fría,
and in the Spies and the Youth League, by por todas las estupideces que les metían en la
lectures, parades, songs, slogans, and martial cabeza, las conferencias, los desfiles, canciones,
music, the natural feeling had been driven out of consignas y música marcial, les arrancaban todo
them. His reason told him that there must be sentimiento natural. La razón le decía que
exceptions, but his heart did not believe it. They forzosamente habría excepciones, pero su
were all impregnable, as the Party intended that corazón no lo creía. Todas ellas eran
they should be. And what he wanted, more even inalcanzables, como deseaba el Partido. Y lo que
than to be loved, was to break down that wall of él quería, aún más que ser amado, era derruir
virtue, even if it were only once in his whole life. aquel muro de estupidez aunque fuera una sola
The sexual act, successfully performed, was vez en su vida. El acto sexual, bien realizado, era
rebellion. Desire was thoughtcrime. Even to have una rebeldía. El deseo era un crimental. Si
awakened Katharine, if he could have achieved it, hubiera conseguido despertar los sentidos de
would have been like a seduction, although she Katharine, esto habría equivalido a una seducción
was his wife. aunque se trataba de su mujer.

But the rest of the story had got to be written Pero tenía que contar el resto de la historia.
down. He wrote: Escribió:

I turned up the lamp. When I saw her in the Encendí la luz. Cuando la vi claramente...
light—

After the darkness the feeble light of the paraffin Después de la casi inexistente luz de la lamparilla
lamp had seemed very bright. For the first time he de aceite, la luz eléctrica parecía cegadora. Por
could see the woman properly. He had taken a step primera vez pudo ver a la mujer tal como era.
towards her and then halted, full of lust and terror. Avanzó un paso hacia ella y se detuvo
He was painfully conscious of the risk he had horrorizado. Comprendía el riesgo a que se había
taken in coming here. It was perfectly possible that expuesto. Era muy posible que las patrullas lo
the patrols would catch him on the way out: for sorprendieran a la salida. Más aún: quizá lo
that matter they might be waiting outside the door estuvieran esperando ya a la puerta. Nada iba a